Witney RFC Golf Day – 2^nd June 2006 

Perfect conditions saw some low scoring at the Witney Lakes Golf Course as 41 golfers took part in the 16th (I think) Golf Day. The winner was Larry who plundered an impressive 46 stapleford points and argueably should have been on a mans handicap - don't worry Larry, you will be next year ! He narrowly beat Copper who blasted  45 points and Paul Bee who notched 44. All three will be crucified by the handicap secretary next year.

Other winners were,

NTP Prizes, Andy Payne and Donald Hare

Longest Drives, Robin Chalk and Les Robinson
Best Gross, Robin Chalk (80)           

Least Stapleford Points, Geoff Jones (3)
Youngest Player, Rhys Lewis

Services to Scotch, Douggie and Alan Richens 

Thanks to Mick the Stick, Sarah and Pip for their efforts on the beer buggies.

Mark Godfrey Moment 2006

The nominees are as follows:

• Geordie Dave – For doing the Ali shuffle every time he hit the ball
• Robin Baker – managed to fill the swear box very quickly
• DM – when first seen had his sausage between to baps or was it two sausages in a bap? And also the usual methane outings of his overactive sphincter
• The Richens and son combination for their whiskey consumption – a special award for ‘Services to Scotch’ has been recommended.
• Paul Bee – It was sun cream on my eyebrow and on Scotties shirt and no, he didn’t dribble and spit when he stood up!!
• Geoff Jones – After advice from Sarah the Physio, he putted all the way on the 8^th
• Paul Bee – chipped in on the 17^th off JC’s ball.
• Apologies to Monksy and Nick Godfrey were passed on by Paul Bee on behalf of himself and JC for the continual silly banter between the two of them. It seemed easier for Paul to cope with JC’s usual antics as he hadn’t seen him for 5 years – Nick and Monksy have to put up with it a lot more regularly
• Joe Perry – played most of his shots sideways
• Chris Birks – a massive round of 158 which included an 18 on the shortest hole, the 6^th
• “Gareth’s (Lewis) golf was awful.” A quote from his son Rhys
• Andy Bee – Andy Payne had managed to score most of the days cards and asked Andy Bee to take over who then set about marking all the cards again.
• Lolly – stopped for comfort breaks on the 4^th, 8^th, 12^th and 16^th. Complaints regarding extra water hazards were lodged.
• Copper – ran off with the beer buggy with Pip still attached.
• The Campbell’s – (JC and Carl) they are renowned for their tackle count. Their tackle was counted on at least 12 separate occasions.
• The Campbell’s – For (strangely enough) both airing the manhood on the 3^rd, even though they were in separate groups almost an hour apart.
• Jim Gutheridge – Hit a 300 yard shot, 280 into the air, 20 yards along.
• Alan Richens – scored a respectable 54 on the front nine and 101 on the back 9 (whiskey induced scoring).

The top 3 were:

3^rd – Alan Richens – was observed to be trying to pick up his ball but looked like he was at sea due the serious staggering around.

2^nd – JC for doing a Happy Gilmore (taking a run up to the ball with a driver) hitting it and splitting his thumb. (Would have won but he lost points for holding 3 sensible conversations when the normal count is one)

1^st – Lolly and Copper for swapping pants, they fitted Lolly but Copper suffered restrictions and the question needs to be asked Beef or Salmon?

Thanks to Sarah for the photos !

Blue Skies and a Beer for Carl

Its all in the wrist action.

Toad proves he is an all "round" sportsman. 

Alan walks off straight - it must be the front nine ! .... Dougie stays with Pip and Mick at the Beer Buggy.

Strutty opens his shoulders.

Copper opens his mouth !

Larry must have wandered onto the golf course from a rave !

But carefully placed his can on the green.

And then misses the putt.

"Try this Nick, it really helps your game"

"Its like this my boy" ........ Douggie and JC

Nick does .... well I'm not quite sure really.

Wise Words ? ..... probably

Paul lines up on the 9th.

Great follow through ........ not the first time he's heard that !

Is that Tiger Monks on the course ?

More like Montie I think.

Geordie Dave looking every inch the part.

Robin and Scottie focus on the flag.

DM thinks "does my bum look big in this" ?

Scottie passes on some putting tips to Geordie Dave

Robin goes for it on his home course.

Michelle Wie and Tiger Woods eat your hearts out.

Copper has a cheeky flash

Dan is isolated !

Not sure if that was a good one or not.

Carl takes some sand.

But not the ball it seems.

Whats going on here ........ Dan is obviously disturbed by what he sees.

But Carl putts out ............ totally focussed ! 

Pip calms the mood.

And enjoys a calming cigarette ..... very much by the look of it.

Lolly graples with the new technology ....... no mobile phones allowed on golf courses.

Nice stance JC.

Monksy gives it some to the ball !

Scottie looks on up the 18th ....... but did he make the ladies tee ? ..... yes actually

Wanders back to find his beer.

Robin gives it a damn good beating.

While DM prepares for one big follow through.

There it is - you can almost smell the atmosphere !

Geordie Dave is getting better by the hole ....... but his first left room for improvement !

A text book position ............. or perhaps not......... but it worked OK..... "That was alllrite was that one like"

Is that a spare ball on your pocket or are you just ......

Rhys about to show his dad how to drive.

Oh yes, I think he did.

Anything you can do, Dad can do ........ almost as well.

I think that ball stayed hit.

Its just like watching a coaching video is this.

Perfect back swing.

Go through the ball.

Or just try and hit the damn thing.

Joe thought he had the longest shorts of the day.

Robin had the shortest round in terms of shots.

Sticks, Larry and Joe relax ........... its a Bampton thing

As Jobbo gives it some stick

As does Sticks.

Last years Champion Barry was not having the best of days though.

Unlike this years Champion Larry ........ who not only had a girls handicap but also didn't come in the Morris Clown for a beer when we got back to Bampton ..... still his secret is safe with us !